To be young, carefree, and excited about everything sounds so good. Faith like a child. Love without reserve.
Missing my baby and the fact that I'll never watch her do these things. Thankful I have Baby Brother though.
Today I stumbled across the realization that no one will come to me for parent advice, or questions. The only help I'll ever be is if someone goes through this horrible thing and that's unfortunate. That's not a fun thing to have experience in.
What I learned...
ReplyDeleteI'm softer inside and tougher outside.
I have a much deeper empathy for all people suffering.
It can happen to me.
Life goes on and will never be the same.
I have experienced the sovereignty of God.
I can't live without God
As a mother, my pain in my loss is unique.
I see people and interact with people in my life differently - hopefully because my boundaries are stronger, I can forgive and give more.
Some people say that when they look back on a tragedy they can see what they have learned about be thankful that the event happened. Me, never in a 1000 years. I wish upon wish it had never happened. 5 years later, I still have doubts, bad days, get ticked off at God, ask WHY, etc... But, most days, life is good. And I accept what God has given me and trust that even though I can't begin to understand why, it happened. Love and Hugs - Jill